First Time Living With a Roommate: Dos and Don’ts for a Happy Home

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Living with a roommate for the first time can be both exciting and stressful. Whether you’re leaving your family home, tired of living by yourself, moving in with your partner, or looking into co-habitation to save some money, having a roommate can make your life more fun and rewarding.

But, let’s face it: Co-living can be difficult, especially if it’s your first time sharing a home with anyone other than your immediate family. Don’t worry though, we’ve got your back! Here are the 5 essential dos and don’ts of living with a roommate for the first time.  

Two young women in pajamas having a friendly conversation in a bedroom, one sitting on the floor and the other lying on the bed.

The Dos 

1. Set boundaries and expectations 

First things first: It’s time to set some ground rules! That means you should have a friendly chat about what you both expect from each other, who does what, and any personal boundaries. While this might sound stressful, try to think of it as creating a fun little roommate agreement to ensure everyone’s on the same page and living harmoniously. 

2. Decide what is fair when it comes to shopping and expenses 

Sharing is caring, but fair sharing is even better! So, get together and discuss how you’ll split the cost of cleaning products, toiletries, pantry staples, and other supplies. Who’s doing the shopping? How will you share the costs? Sorting these details out early on will keep things fair and set you up for a happy home. 

A person holding a brown paper grocery bag filled with groceries while examining a receipt.

3. Address issues promptly 

Resolving conflicts as soon as they arise helps maintain a happy and peaceful home. For example, if your roommate’s late-night music is making it hard to sleep, or they keep forgetting to do their dishes, bring it up in a friendly and respectful way right away. 

4. Keep common areas tidy 

It goes without saying that nobody appreciates a messy bathroom, dirty socks in the living room or used dishes anywhere other than the kitchen sink. Set up a realistic cleaning schedule, make sure to put things away where they belong and clean your dishes after you use them. 

 A person wearing blue gloves cleaning a kitchen countertop with a spray bottle and cloth.

5. Establish guest and noise policies 

Whether you’re a social butterfly or prefer quiet time, make sure you communicate your needs and plans with your roommate. That includes setting up your home’s guest policies — who you can invite, when, and for how long. And don’t forget to keep noise levels in check, especially late at night.  

 

The Don’ts 

1. Don’t be passive-aggressive 

Instead of leaving snarky notes or making passive-aggressive comments, have constructive conversations about living together. Be direct, kind, and respectful when discussing issues to make co-living a stress-free environment for everyone involved. 

Two young women arguing in a living room, one looking frustrated while the other gestures animatedly in the background.

2. Don’t violate your rental agreement 

Stick to the rules! This applies to both the house rules you set with your roommate and the terms of your lease agreement. Always pay your share of the rent on time, don’t break things, and don’t make any changes without the landlord’s permission. Following the rules your landlord set up not only keeps you out of trouble but also shows your roommate that you’re responsible and trustworthy. 

3. Don’t borrow without permission 

Never assume it’s okay to take something, even if you plan on putting it back or replacing it soon. Whether you need to borrow your roommate’s bike to get to class or use some of their hot sauce, always ask first. Respecting their belongings builds trust and keeps everyone happy. 

 Close-up of a person adding hot sauce to an oyster in a white dish.

4. Don’t overuse shared spaces 

Just as your rental space should be divided equally, so should the time spent in common areas. Don’t hog the kitchen or bathroom, and, if you plan on spending a lot of time cooking, hosting a big dinner, or want to take a long bath, make sure to give your roommate a heads-up. 

5. Don’t interrupt personal time 

Although living with a roommate can be a great way to make solid friendships, everybody needs some time to themselves. Don’t bother your roommate if they want some alone time or if they’re in the middle of something important. Instead, create private spaces and respect each other’s privacy to keep a peaceful home. 

Two people working in a cozy apartment at night, one using a laptop on the couch and the other using a desktop computer at a desk.

 

Living with a roommate for the first time is like starting a fun new adventure filled with chances to grow and make great friends. The secret to a happy co-living experience is all about being respectful, open communication, and finding the middle ground when needed. By following these dos and don’ts, you’ll create a stress-free living environment that you and your roommates can all call home.  

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Alina Ilies is a creative writer at RentCafe. They cover various topics related to the rental market and apartment living, including design, sustainability and renting with pets. Previously, Alina held roles in branding, copywriting, and social media management. They are passionate about nature, animals, graphic design, urbanization, and environmentalism. Alina has a BA in Applied Modern Languages.

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